My Brain, Crowded, Cluttered, and Cozy.

To start this off, I am not wired like everyone else. I'm sure I've said this in the past but over the last year I've embraced it to the fullest. A dear friend often tells me, "I really wish your brain had a teleprompter so I can figure out what's going on when you get all the ideas!"

Often times I wish I had a teleprompter too, with DVR so I could remember all the good stuff that whooshes by. That and if life had background music, ufda, life would be a breeze because we could all figure out what is about to happen.

The simple fact of life is that none of us know what is going to happen. We can think and plan and try to get everything all laid out but then someone throws a turtle shell and we have to adapt. We could all plan everything to be perfect but all we'd be left with is the disappointment when it doesn't all go to plan.

An engineer, the harder I think about something, the more overcomplicated it gets. I've designed some of the craziest things on a whim and made them up as I go, they turned out great. On the other hand I've over thought, over prepared, and over analyzed something I'm working to the point of it being insane. The older I get, the easier it is for me to scale back a project because in the long run it's all about functionality. The more moving pieces you throw at it, the more things that can go wrong.

I have spent the last year attempting to retrain my thought patterns. It seems I have gone from being gung ho on one thing to hyper fixated at many, many things at once. For me this is great. I have a tendency to get a plan in mind, gather everything for it and then hammer it out. Well before if I was missing something or I needed to adapt something, it kinda got me down in the dumps. Now I just do a quick refocus onto something else and wait for parts to show up.

My brain is the biggest wealth of useful and completely useless knowledge ever. I could be on one topic and then here comes the squirrel and I'm explaining nuclear fission. I wouldn't trade it for anything. Sure I've got some bats in my belfry but no mad scientist doesn't.

On another side note, I'm 28 days sober and loving it. I've also made the decision to go carnivore for awhile. Well with the exception of this weekend, I'm sick so comfort food was a must. Mental clarity and a strong body go a long way in the battle of good vs evil.

In closing, don't try to have everything in life figured out. I'm 41 and most of the time I just wing it and I'm happy. Getting your brain wrapped up in this and that and what about this and ope there's that too, all takes away from just living. One thing my brain needs, and everyone else's for that matter, is a dimmer switch. Just tone it all down and let yourself live.

Peace!